When it comes to defining your own identity, there are some things you can do. The reality is that you have two options for the majority of how others perceive you: You can either be yourself and hope that's okay with others, or you can manage every aspect of your identity and have no time for anything else. Let's look at the cons and pros of each.
Managing your identity can be a lot of work, but it does mean you're going to likely be one of the popular kids. When I say it requires a lot of work, I mean you'll need to spend a lot of time keeping track of current trends, establishing contacts, and maintaining social networks. You will also be managing your wardrobe, keeping it up to date and constantly shopping for more clothes. And then there is the physical maintenance as well, such as haircuts, manipedis, keeping an eye on what you eat, and making sure you get all of the right exercises. In short, there is a lot of work involved in being what everyone expects you to be and there really isn't a lot of time you can spend doing anything else, but you will be invited to just about every party.
On the other hand, being yourself means fewer parties but greater freedom. You can play all of the games you want, you can work out or not, or you can just hang out with your friends. You can also afford to be honest; popularity usually means being nice to everyone, and that can get annoying. It also means that people have less power over your actions; if they threaten to uninvite you unless you do something you would rather not. Sure, you're not going to get all the girls but you will have friends rather than associates.
Obviously all that work a popular person puts into being popular will pay off later on as he is able to draw on those for any kind of business he happens to run, especially if it happens to be local, so there are some advantages to putting in all of that work. To be popular or not to be popular, that is the question, and you only you get to decide which one.
Managing your identity can be a lot of work, but it does mean you're going to likely be one of the popular kids. When I say it requires a lot of work, I mean you'll need to spend a lot of time keeping track of current trends, establishing contacts, and maintaining social networks. You will also be managing your wardrobe, keeping it up to date and constantly shopping for more clothes. And then there is the physical maintenance as well, such as haircuts, manipedis, keeping an eye on what you eat, and making sure you get all of the right exercises. In short, there is a lot of work involved in being what everyone expects you to be and there really isn't a lot of time you can spend doing anything else, but you will be invited to just about every party.
On the other hand, being yourself means fewer parties but greater freedom. You can play all of the games you want, you can work out or not, or you can just hang out with your friends. You can also afford to be honest; popularity usually means being nice to everyone, and that can get annoying. It also means that people have less power over your actions; if they threaten to uninvite you unless you do something you would rather not. Sure, you're not going to get all the girls but you will have friends rather than associates.
Obviously all that work a popular person puts into being popular will pay off later on as he is able to draw on those for any kind of business he happens to run, especially if it happens to be local, so there are some advantages to putting in all of that work. To be popular or not to be popular, that is the question, and you only you get to decide which one.
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