The worst thing about being a boy is girls. No matter what your personal take is, girls are the bane of your existence. There is no force more irritating, interesting, and aggravating than the female side of the species, and you get the joy of figuring out how to deal with them. There are no easy answers for you, but let's see what advice we can offer you.
Let's get rid of an elephant in the room: You may not be interested in girls, either yet or ever, and that's fine. They may be interested in you, possibly because of that lack of interest; some girls like that safety factor or because of the challenge. That's fine. All I can say is participate in the usual activities for now, as they may satisfy your curiosity. Have some fun with it, and take notes as necessary. Regardless of where your interests lie, sort of enjoy dealing with it, no matter how aggravating it is.
For the rest of you, you are seriously in trouble. You're going to hear a lot about how you're letting your little head lead you around, and it's true, to a degree. Get used to it, and consider it part of being a kid. However, this isn't about sex; it's about the social aspects of dealing with girls, and how you need to figure out what the rules are and quickly. Complicating the issue is that there is the problem that you want to really want to have a girlfriend, and not just because you're told you have to but because there is some interest on your part. So let's give you some; you can adapt them as needed.
First, avoid sex. You're going to want to both for the experience and for the bragging rights, and that latter is a problem. Bragging rights is not why you should have sex, especially as it affects the reputation of other people when you brag about it, and not necessarily in positive way. If you do have sex, don't brag about it. Note that I'm not saying avoid it completely, just don't brag about it. You're going to learn that the biggest braggers don't do it, and bragging can turn on you, especially when word gets to much larger relatives.
When she says "no", assume she means "no". You can argue all you want about what you think she really means, but that attitude can and will get you in trouble at some point. For now, don't make any assumptions and just back down when she says "no"; you may take a hit to your reputation, but that hit is a lot better than the consequences. Keep in mind that those consequences can include you having to deal with rape charges before you charge ahead, especially in states where consent is mandatory.
If she's being aggressive about it, run. You may want to charge in, but there is usually an agenda if she's coming after you; she may want to see boys fight and the easiest way to do that is to have a boy make a pass at her in front of her friends and family, or she may be trying to make her ex jealous. Bottom Line: Even kissing her can be trouble, and it's trouble you don't want. If it gets too hazardous, you can get away with yelling for help; it may be embarrassing but the alternatives are usually worse.
Always travel in pairs, at least. You need someone to worry about your back, and you need to worry about someone else's. Travelling in groups can keep you out of trouble, as long as you listen to each other. This is a time you need to listen the kid saying run, and you have the means to escape from it, or at least send someone for help. This is a time when it pays to have a mobile phone and a good pair of shoes.
I only hope you navigate what can be a hazardous situation, and this should help some.
Let's get rid of an elephant in the room: You may not be interested in girls, either yet or ever, and that's fine. They may be interested in you, possibly because of that lack of interest; some girls like that safety factor or because of the challenge. That's fine. All I can say is participate in the usual activities for now, as they may satisfy your curiosity. Have some fun with it, and take notes as necessary. Regardless of where your interests lie, sort of enjoy dealing with it, no matter how aggravating it is.
For the rest of you, you are seriously in trouble. You're going to hear a lot about how you're letting your little head lead you around, and it's true, to a degree. Get used to it, and consider it part of being a kid. However, this isn't about sex; it's about the social aspects of dealing with girls, and how you need to figure out what the rules are and quickly. Complicating the issue is that there is the problem that you want to really want to have a girlfriend, and not just because you're told you have to but because there is some interest on your part. So let's give you some; you can adapt them as needed.
First, avoid sex. You're going to want to both for the experience and for the bragging rights, and that latter is a problem. Bragging rights is not why you should have sex, especially as it affects the reputation of other people when you brag about it, and not necessarily in positive way. If you do have sex, don't brag about it. Note that I'm not saying avoid it completely, just don't brag about it. You're going to learn that the biggest braggers don't do it, and bragging can turn on you, especially when word gets to much larger relatives.
When she says "no", assume she means "no". You can argue all you want about what you think she really means, but that attitude can and will get you in trouble at some point. For now, don't make any assumptions and just back down when she says "no"; you may take a hit to your reputation, but that hit is a lot better than the consequences. Keep in mind that those consequences can include you having to deal with rape charges before you charge ahead, especially in states where consent is mandatory.
If she's being aggressive about it, run. You may want to charge in, but there is usually an agenda if she's coming after you; she may want to see boys fight and the easiest way to do that is to have a boy make a pass at her in front of her friends and family, or she may be trying to make her ex jealous. Bottom Line: Even kissing her can be trouble, and it's trouble you don't want. If it gets too hazardous, you can get away with yelling for help; it may be embarrassing but the alternatives are usually worse.
Always travel in pairs, at least. You need someone to worry about your back, and you need to worry about someone else's. Travelling in groups can keep you out of trouble, as long as you listen to each other. This is a time you need to listen the kid saying run, and you have the means to escape from it, or at least send someone for help. This is a time when it pays to have a mobile phone and a good pair of shoes.
I only hope you navigate what can be a hazardous situation, and this should help some.
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